Expert: Erika Kirk's public mourning is 'battle cry' that 'echoes throughout the world'

Grief is a universal human experience, and each person navigates their healing journey in their own way. The recent tragic shooting of Charlie Kirk, who leaves behind his wife Erika and their two young children, has thrust the family's mourning into the public eye.

In the days following his death, the family's grief has been shared publicly, with thousands of supporters leaving messages on Erika's social media accounts. High-profile figures, including President Donald Trump, have also spoken out about the tragedy, drawing further attention to the family's loss.

Erika has used social media to share poignant images of herself beside her husband's casket, embracing him and holding his hands. Her heartfelt message accompanying the photos expresses her desire for her husband's memory to live on forever.

The post has received over 240k comments, demonstrating her openness to sharing her grief and receiving condolences from the public, reports the Mirror US.

"The sound of this widow weeping echoes throughout this world like a battle cry," Erika wrote in the caption. "I have no idea what any of this means. But baby I know you do and so does our Lord."

Public grief can take several forms, and Erika's case is on the extreme end. Other ways grief may manifest itself publicly is through funerals, GoFundMe campaigns for funeral-related costs, or when the death is shared on social media.

Collective grieving and sharing the emotions tied to death can be a powerful experience.

Dr Robyn Koslowitz, PhD, a licensed child psychologist at The Centre for Psychological Growth of New Jersey, shares her insight into the power of public grieving.

"In the first moments after a loss, what people often call 'strength' is really the anaesthesia of shock... The nervous system protects us by numbing the full weight of what has happened," Koslowitz explains. "But that doesn't mean the grief won't surface later. Shock gets us through the initial days. Mourning comes after."

What does public grieving look like?

There is a distinct difference between public grief and private grief. Someone might put on a brave face to the public, but you never know what their mourning looks like behind closed doors.

"Public rituals-funerals, memorials, shivas, vigils-give us a container. They restore connection at a time when loss feels deeply isolating," says Koslowitz.

Being in a space where others recognise your grief and tell you "You are not alone in this" is "profoundly protective," explains Koslowitz. Public ceremonies honouring someone serve as acts of recognition, celebrating that person's life for what it truly was.

When individuals share memories or deliver speeches, these moments create connections and bear witness to all the remarkable qualities of the departed.

"They were here, and they were amazing, and their loss means something," says Koslowitz.

"That helps your brain anchor the reality of that person and remember them."

She continues: "But the harder work of mourning usually happens later, in private moments, sometimes long after the public attention has faded."

What occurs when the period of public grieving comes to an end?

Following the flurry that accompanies funeral preparations, commemorating the deceased's life, and handling their affairs, the burden of their passing may feel extraordinarily overwhelming in solitude.

"That's why it is important not to confuse public grieving with the ongoing process of mourning," Koslowitz says.

"A person may look supported because hundreds of people attended the funeral or because thousands left messages online... But private mourning unfolds over months and years."

The bereavement journey continues beyond the funeral service, and it's crucial to acknowledge the time required to work through those feelings following a loss.

"People don't die in the past. They die in the future," she said.

"A widow may grieve again at an anniversary dinner she attends alone, or when she realizes her husband will not see their child graduate."

Public mourning and private mourning both serve crucial roles in the overall healing journey.

However, it's during the quiet, personal moments when you can focus on asking yourself the profound questions and undertake the difficult work to reimagine your life following a bereavement - because life does continue and can feel complete once more.

"Public grieving creates community, and that's important, particularly for the dead person so that they can live on in people's memories," she explains. "Private grieving is about identity, who am I in the context of this loss?".

How to support those who have lost loved ones

When the home-cooked meals stop arriving and the telephone falls silent after the funeral, these are times when the community must come together to support the bereaved person.

"The best thing we can do for someone who has lost a loved one is to show up not only at the beginning but also later, when the public grieving has quieted," advises Koslowitz. "Support that endures past the shock is what helps the mourner metabolize the loss."